Hey folks. This is the one who even I thought was dead. So I have been thinking alot last few days and I just couldnt forget MyM. I want to share my honest impressions and give some feedback about the network with everyone and motivate people to share theirs too. First things first. Upon coming over to MyM like four years ago there was this one server on top of the server list. I joined there and played a while. Now from changing modpack to modpack and looking for a server I always appeared to be joining MyM again. That's how I started recognizing the network as a whole. That is a good factor: Diversity in modpacks helps gathering a wide community. When playing here for longer it is the community, the very well overthought plugin system and the diversity that really makes this network unique in a positive way. It was almost a year ago when I began actively interacting with the community on the CrashLanding server. At this time it was hard to encounter staff and I even thought there was none on the network. But one day @mineminemine258 came on there and did some mod stuff. I've watched that and thought I'd apply for mod myself. To make it short, after a second try I got accepted and there was a huge diversity of other impressions to overwhelm me. There was people I have never seen before, modpacks I have never heard of and plugins that were new territory. There is a huge jump gap inbetween the beings of a standard member and a junior mod that I do not believe many people are ready to take. After a week and the good training of @stijn04356789 it was almost doable for me then. It is very hard for european players to be trained as you are only available to a few other europeans. Back when I was mod there were only very few people online and ready to train when it was standard european afternoon/evening time. The training and testing phase for jr mods is really essential. It is needed to let staffs learn what they handle and how they have to react to different situations. Now when you become full moderator there is a not so huge but essential difference: there is noone to look for you unless you ask or do something wrong. As a mod you gain full responsibility on everything you do. No single case is the same. Thats why I always tried to get all sides of the story and maintain as much information as I could get before judgeing. Sadly there were other people in the staffteam at that time (9 months ago) that were judgeing right after the punishment catalogue and had no empathy on why I judged different. Later on I applied to Sr Mod and got accepted. Before I applied I asked other seniors on what their job is. That came equal to the ones listed in the application form. Later it appeared there were other tasks like managing the moderators and executing the orders of the directors and managers directly. By the time my interest decreased. From a cool free-time activity it became more and more a stressful job. I fled more and more. From playing other games that I enjoyed to taking extra absences away from home to flee from my computer.. I did not want to staff anymore, but at the same time I did not want to give up what I achieved. I felt like the community saw some sort helper in me. After discussing with the managers after a tragic personal event I decided to resign. For the moment (I thought). I wanted to apply back but did not get accepted. There was some words falling and attributes being called to me that I did not even realize in my naivety. To see what others thought about me made me really sad... Sad about the fact, that noone ever messaged me about these to help me repair these mistakes, it was all done behind my back when I could not look at it anymore. The staffteam had shown itself to me from another side. The chores in the team made me change. I realize that now when I look back. All the people I thougt of as good friends and persons to talk to had gone for different reasons. I felt isolated. It was hard for me to gain other contacts in the team as I always appeared aggressive and naive. I only could release my friendly side when I was working with players. I did not feel understood in the team. My concepts did not work out with theirs. The only one who made me feel welcome in the team anymore was @_prpl_. For her every staffmember was a benefit and she let us know that. I always wanted best for the network. I offered my time over half a year and worked on alot of cases. I ruined my relationship with the staffteam by being a huge idiot and agitating. I had no more friends in the team one day. I thought I could still be a benefit when I applied again but the others did not think so. Now I've grown up a lot more, realized a lot of things and want to reach out. Do better than me. It is not possible to be a "good" staff member if the people who valuate your work and who you work with as a partner can't stand you. Too much interaction with the community made the team a second-place-group for me. But also: Apply for staff. It is a great opportunity to be part of a great team as long as you don't agitate on them as I did. You get to interact with so many different kinds of people every single case. It's worth it. And if you just test, you can leave anytime. I'd be really appreciated if you have anything else to say about the network and have something to mention that is important to know for everyone. MyM is a great place like no other and I would still be ready anytime to serve it. Endo out.
For me, almost none of the reason for my love of MYM is the staff. It's the community itself! Don't get me wrong, I love some of the staff members here, but honestly I don't care one bit outside of support issues who is staff and who is not. I understand that staffing such a large network is a difficult job and I respect staff for it but outside of that I don't see staff any differently from normal players. One of my favorite parts about the forums here is that staff and non staff can comment together with no discrimination. Both staff and non staff can post jokes, one up others, and have heartfelt discussions on the meaning of life together. This holds true in game as well I have a close friend on the staffing team and I am able to play with him the exact same way as before he joined the team. MYM is a great community and I would never let a few inconsiderate or overly judgmental staff (or non staff for that matter) out of many get in the way of that. Endo I truly don't think it matters if you are staff or not I think of you as a friend regardless; and I know that I am not the only one who thinks of you that way. Staffing is only one of many ways to make a difference here. You just keep being you wherever you go!
Personally I think the relation staff to staff kept half a year ago was different from the one of staff to players. There was a few staff-only comments showing some signs of authority over the community. As I said I see that I have changed while being staff. I was both member and staff in one at first, but my personality changed due to some other influences coming from both the team and the community. I understand for you staff are the same as players in those conversations, they just have a colorful name. Thats a good thing, players should see them as a part of them and not as some sort of police just running around coldheartedly and hammering around bans.
I think it's great that players are being honest with us staff, and giving us feedback. It helps us grow and improve so we can keep assisting all of you on a daily basis. As Endorian said: Hope to see you all around, -Colin
